1.8.10

Learing from the Loving

I've said before how important i believe it is that we learn to love the life we're living.
But i woke up this morning not so in love with my life... which is a most unfortunate spot to find oneself in!
To remedy this little hiccup in my journey for daily joy, I think I'll share with ya'll (ha like i'm from texas) the things I've come to better understand because B. is gone -primarily because his absence is the reason my life loving was in short supply this morning.

*EVERY moment spent with someone you love so much as I love that sweet boy, is a fleeting one and should not be wasted in anger or contention.
Obviously the full spectrum of emotions will exist in any healthy relationship, but things should mostly be positive and happy oui? mos def!

*To my very core of tiniest cores I know he is the rightest (not a word. i know) man for me, because no thing and no one else my whole life long has been worth sacrificing and enduring so much for.

*That real and raw meaning of sacrifice is much better understood on my part now because of this whole ridiculous situation.

*As any two people complete a difficult task with each other's help, not only does it make both individuals stronger... it strengthens the bond between those souls as well!

*I freakin hate talking on the phone! But when that's all you've got, you learn to make it work. I'll be the first to admit that my communication skills are sub-par, but I've learned to better relay my ideas and feelings through words-only over these past few months.

* Absence truly does make the heart grow fonder, but not without tears and prayers. I mean I still would never wish it upon my worst person.

*You've heard about how whoever you decide to marry is going to have flaws and habits that make you crazy, and I'm positive that B. and I will be no different. But this long distance business has helped me understand that his flaws are minor compared to how great he'll be in real life!
you know..beyond a voice over the phone or a picture or a text. To embrace those flaws that come from a person who is physically tangible is something I want above all else!

I know that this entry proves just how young and naive our love is...but that just makes it all the more beautiful!

And one day i promise that I'll stop writing about love and wedding junk and junk, but mostly it's all I do these days.
Except for the glitter sexy roller derby bachelorette party last night for my one Lindsey K.
Happy times. and tif can totally skate!!!

I feel better. I think I love the life I'm living. I mean just look at the things I'm learning! Toot sweet and farewell for today.